


I want my life to be with you

by casdoms (moffwithhishead)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Marriage Proposal, Wedding Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-06
Updated: 2015-03-06
Packaged: 2018-03-16 15:01:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3492728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moffwithhishead/pseuds/casdoms
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas, his best friend, ex-kinda-angel, ex-god, not boyfriend. Cas, the guy that Dean is allowed to kiss whenever he wants. Cas, the guy who texts him dumb pictures with emoji's whenever he's out on his own. Cas, the guy who steals Dean's clothes out of his laundry and then whines that they smell. Cas, the guy who hogs the blankets and makes him laugh and cannot use the toaster oven to save his life. Cas, the one guy who's always had his back, always made him feel safe, no matter what. </p><p>Cas... </p><p>Dean's breath stutters for a second as a thought runs through his head.</p><p>Cas, the guy he wants to spend the rest of his life with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I want my life to be with you

**Author's Note:**

> random inspiration strike. writing vows is hard because in actuality they'd be crying too much to say anything coherently //sigh

When Dean finally works up the nerve to propose, they're on the side of the highway in the middle of nowhere Montana. 

The Continental broke down when they were driving back to the bunker after a two week long hunt. Sam took the Impala to go find a gas station or a shop to see if they could get a tow to come pick it up. Dean's sitting on the trunk with Cas next to him and two cold water bottles in between them.

He doesn't have a ring or a plan. He, technically, doesn't even have Cas - at least, not in the way you're supposed to have someone when you propose to them. 

But, see, here's the thing - this isn't new.

Their knees bumping together as they sit in silence, save for the music playing on Cas' phone, isn't anything new.

The casual touches throughout the day, the hands on the lower back, the lingering clap on the shoulder - this is all par for the course, has been for years.

Not even the kissing is new, not really. 

It's been years since it was something they both felt comfortable doing whenever and not just when they thought they were going to lose each other. It's been years since Cas had just walked up to him in Purgatory one day and kissed the shit out of him up against a tree. 

Maybe it started again because Cas isn't quite human now, but he's more human than he has been for a long time, and Dean thought he was going to lose him. Maybe the only way they can do this is if they think it's going to be the last time, the last chance they'll ever get.

Cas shifts a little so he can lay back against the car, resting on the back window as well. 

Dean just watches him with a small smile, his eyes lingering on the way his old t-shirt clings a little to Cas' body, shows off every line of his chest. He grins when Cas pulls the sunglasses off the top of his head and slides them onto his face properly,  _finally_. 

"It is very hot," he mumbles grumpily and moves a hand up to his forehead to block out the sunlight even more. 

"Yeah, well, I told you to keep water jugs in your trunk for shit like this," Dean chuckles quietly and squeezes Cas' knee. 

He moves their waters out of the way and lays down next to Cas so he's facing him, resting on his elbow with a small grin, "The weather doesn't exactly care about when a convenient time for your shitty pimp mobile to break down is." 

Cas doesn't open his eyes or turn to look at Dean. Instead, he just carefully covers the other man's face with his hand and pushes him away a little. 

It makes Dean throw his head back and laugh, grabbing Cas' wrist before he has a chance to pull the hand away. He presses a kiss to the rough palm and twines their fingers together, still grinning like an idiot, "Aw, c'mon Cas, your car's gonna be okay. Probably overheated and something pretty simple."

"You didn't even look at the engine that hard," Cas grumbles in response and reluctantly turns his head to look at Dean. 

He can just barely make out through the glasses how hard Cas is squinting at him, like he's not sure if he wants to kiss him or shove him off of the trunk. Both are probably strong contenders at the moment. 

"Yeah, well, I  _know_  you overheated but nothing was wrong on the surface," he shrugged a little and pulled Cas' hand just hard enough to make him scoot closer. "I can't take apart your engine on the side of the road, babe. It's like 110 out here." 

Castiel scowls a little more but doesn't pull his hand away, "Then why the fuck are you so chipper?" 

Dean snorts before shrugging a little bit, his thumb tracing over the back of Cas' hand, "Not like I got anything to be bummed about, dude. You're alive and in one piece. You're coming back to the bunker with us. Sammy's in one piece and as whiney as ever. I'm in one piece. Baby's as good as ever." 

Cas says something in response but Dean's so caught up in watching the way his face moves when he's annoyed and the way he uses his hands when he yells at Dean that he barely notices. 

In truth, he's not really sure why he's so happy. He just knows that being here on the side of the road with Cas feels right.

Cas, his best friend, ex-kinda-angel, ex-god, not boyfriend. Cas, the guy that Dean is allowed to kiss whenever he wants. Cas, the guy who texts him dumb pictures with emoji's whenever he's out on his own. Cas, the guy who steals Dean's clothes out of his laundry and then whines that they smell. Cas, the guy who hogs the blankets and makes him laugh and cannot use the toaster oven to save his life. Cas, the one guy who's always had his back, always made him feel safe, no matter what. 

 _Cas_... 

Dean's breath stutters for a second as a thought runs through his head.

 _Cas, the guy he wants to spend the rest of his life with_. 

"Not to mention the fact that your brother has a seven inch gash on his leg that will need stitches if you want it to heal pro -" 

"Holy shit," Dean breathes out, effectively cutting off whatever the hell Cas had to say next. 

Cas, it seems, either didn't notice Dean's interruption or he's too annoyed at the whole world to care, because he just keeps talking. 

"And you, Dean Winchester, you probably have a concussion! You threw yourself in front of that monster and you let it toss you around like a ragdoll and you're really sitting here saying that -" 

It feels like the whole world might be spinning, more so than the scientifically normal amount. 

"Holy shit," he breathes out again, trying to process that thought. 

Some part of his brain registers that Cas is still talking but Dean can't help himself - he starts giggling after a moment. He's a little hysterical, maybe from the heat and the lack of enough water, maybe from the realization that he wants to marry this grumpy asshole next to him and wake up to his stupid bedhead and his bad breath for the rest of his life. 

He lets himself fall forward so his forehead is resting on Cas' shoulder as he laughs and laughs, unable to stop himself. He laughs so hard there are tears in his eyes. 

 _That_  seems to get enough of Cas' attention to derail him from his grumpy rant. He frowns and rests a cautious hand on Dean's back, pulling him closer out of habit, "Dean...? Are you alright?" 

"I'm fine," Dean tries to get out in between giggles, but he thinks it might sound like he's actually crying. 

"Um," Cas licks his lips for a moment, "Perhaps we should wait inside the car... see if we can get the air conditioner working..." 

Dean shakes his head a little bit and looks up at Cas with a grin, "No, no, it's..." Another fit of giggles overtakes him and he rubs a hand over his face, "It's fine. It's great. It's - it's fucking fantastic actually." 

Cas is still staring at him like he thinks Dean might drop dead from a heat stroke at any second now, "I am going to call Sam..." 

He starts to get off of the trunk but Dean stops him by crawling on top of Cas so he's got his knees bracketing either side. He's still laughing, but now he thinks he might just be laughing at the look of complete bewilderment on Cas' face. It's nice to see him not look so grumpy. 

He leans down and kisses Cas gently, which is kinda hard to do when you can't stop laughing.

Cas doesn't seem to mind though, because he makes a quiet noise and reaches up to thread his fingers through Dean's hair as he kisses back. 

It's hot and they're both sweaty and gross and rural Montana probably isn't the place to make out with another dude on the back of a car in the middle of the day, but hey, Dean's never had good luck with particularly well thought-out plans. 

It's the plans where he wings it that usually work out the best.

And he's been winging this entire relationship since day one when he stabbed the man underneath him in that barn all those years ago. 

"Marry me," he breathes out in between kisses.

Dean starts kissing his way down to Cas' neck, making sure to leave as many love bites and marks as he can since they'll heal soon anyway. 

He sighs contently and murmurs the question against the taught, tan skin of Cas' throat with every kiss.

" _Marry me_."

Cas' silence doesn't worry him and it doesn't make him pause, because he knows that Cas will answer him in due time. He knows that Cas is a big boy and he can take care of himself and Dean's always got the green light unless Cas tells him otherwise. 

He finally looks up when he gets to the fraying collar of the t-shirt, grins when he sees Cas' wide eyes staring back at him. The sunglasses are laying on the hood next to them, reflecting the sunlight back into Cas' face. 

"What?" Cas finally croaks out, his voice sounding rough and hoarse.

"Will..." Dean leans back up so their faces are closer together again and he smiles, bumping his nose against Cas' cheek, "Will you marry me?"

"I..." Cas' breath hitches when Dean presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth, "I don't - I don't exist in the eyes of the government, Dean."

He shrugs a little, the smile never fading, "I'm still dead according to those guys."

"We wouldn't be able to get a marriage license," Cas stutters out.

Again, Dean shrugs, this time kissing the other corner of Cas' mouth, "Who says we need one?" 

"You don't even have a ring!" Cas squeaks out in his nervous voice, but his hands come up to grip Dean's hips a little bit possessively, like he's kinda scared that if he lets go Dean will just disappear into the universe. 

"Here," Dean hums a little bit and takes his mom's ring off of his hand and holds it out to Cas, "I've got this one." 

Cas knows what it is. He knows that Dean stole it from John's bag when he was six years old and that he's worn it every day since. He knows that Mary's ring is one of the most important things he owns.

And now he knows that he's giving it over to Cas.

"I..." He takes the ring with a shaking hand and stares at it like he can't believe it's real, "Dean, this... I can't -" 

Dean leans down and pulls Cas into a kiss with a free hand resting on his cheek.

Most people would think that Cas is saying no, that he doesn't want to get married, but Dean gets it. He gets what the questions are about, he gets the shaking hands, the crack in his voice. He understands that for the two of them, who still don't think they're going to make it another five years, agreeing to spend the rest of your life with someone is kinda terrifying.

Cas is thousands of years old and he's been alone for nearly all of it. Even as an angel he wasn't  _truly_  tied to heaven, not like the other angels were. But saying yes would tie him to Dean in a more physical, terrifyingly real sense. 

He wouldn't just have that profound bond anymore, he'd have a ring and a husband too. 

"She'd want you to have it, Cas," Dean murmurs as he pulls back just enough to smile at him. He leans down and bumps their noses together, " _I_  want you to have it." 

Cas is still staring at him with wide, awe filled eyes, but he nods and slips the ring onto the appropriate finger with shaking hands, "I..." 

He lets himself stare at it for a moment before nodding, "Okay." 

Dean beams, his eyes sparkling, "You wanna marry me?" 

The answering grin is brighter than the sun and it makes Dean's heart stutter in his chest, "Yes." Cas seems to have gotten over the shock of the question because he starts laughing himself and nods enthusiastically, "Yes, hell  _yes_  I want to marry you, Dean Winchester." 

This time he's the one who pulls Dean down into a kiss.

They're both laughing and they can't stop smiling and their teeth keep knocking together but Cas said  _yes_  so Dean can't really bring himself to care. 

"Mr. Castiel Winchester," he murmurs against Cas' lips and starts giggling all over again, giddy just at the idea of it.

Cas' eyes are bright as he laughs himself, " _Yes_." 

Dean feels like his heart might actually burst out of his chest he's so happy. 

* * *

 

They get married two weeks later in the woods behind the bunker.

Charlie is Dean's best man and Claire is Cas'. Sam decided he wanted to get ordained and do the whole real wedding thing, vows and all. Jody and Donna came to watch the ridiculous mess.

Dean cries first and Charlie wins $20 from her bet with Sam. His vows are short and sweet and to the point and they make everybody tear up.

"Cas, you literally dragged my sorry ass out of hell and put me back together again and you've been helping me do that ever since. I still got no idea what the hell you see in me but every morning that I wake up and see your stupid bedhead, I know that I'm the luckiest moron in the entire universe. And I can't believe you said yes. And... I would rather share one lifetime with you than face all the ages of this world alone." 

Cas laughs and squeezes Dean's hand, the grin so wide on his face that his eye crinkles are out in full force. He doesn't even pretend that he's not crying.

"Dean Winchester, you are the purest soul I have ever had the honor to witness in my entire existence. You are smart and kind and so good and you are  _strong_. I count my blessings everyday that I received the assignment I did. You turned my whole world upside down, Dean. And that is something that I will always be grateful for. 

I love you. I love you for your obstinance, your stubbornness, your unfailing bravery. I love you for your heart, your mind, your soul. I love you for trying when you were scared and out of your depth. I love you for fighting for me, for believing in me when I couldn't. I love your disdain of my car. I love the way you complain about my music. I love you, because I have been lucky enough to see every side of you. The good and the bad... and I cannot wait to spend the rest of this life alongside you."

* * *

 

Their "marriage license" is framed and hanging up across from their bed. It's on the back of a chinese menu they found in Cas' car the day Dean proposed.

> I, Dean Winchester, promise to love Castiel Winchester even when I hate him because he's being a little shit and won't pick up his dirty clothes. I promise to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, through sickness and health, through death or the devil or that dick Metatron do us part.

> I, Castiel Winchester, promise to love Dean Winchester even when I do not like him. I promise to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, through sickness and heath, for better or worse, through death do us part.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tumblr at samerasure


End file.
